Hearing rumours about Topher Grace possibly playing Venom in Spiderman 3, we wondered what the consequences might be if we had some more of the characters played by That 70s Show characters. An experiment:

Spiderman - Kelso

Venom - Eric
Hobgoblin - Hyde
Sandman - Fez

Venom: Hey Spidey, how come you let MJ push you around like that, man?
Spidey: Huh? What you talking about?
Venom: I mean it, man - you're a superhero guy dude. You can't take that shit.
Spidey: Hey, I don't take shit from anybody! And MJ...uhh...yeah, she takes shit from me!
Hobgoblin: Ah c'mon - she's got you wrapped around her pinky, Spidey-O. It's always like "Peter, you don't spend enough time with me" and "Peter, you can deliver pizza all day and still forget to pick up groceries?" and "Peter, why do you always have to hang out with those freaks?"
Spidey: What? Hey, I hang out with you freaks because I'm supposed to be, like, kicking your asses!
Venom: Yeah, we've been meaning to talk with you about that, man. You've got to tighten up your act - we can't keep pretending that you know how to fight for much longer.
Hobgoblin: Listen to the man, loser. Why don't you practise your moves once in a while?
Spidey: It's not like I don't try! But all those chinese-sounding words make me hungry!

(Enter Sandman)